Week 2 of ABDC! This week, we learn the identities of the other five crews in this season’s competition! Do they meet the bar set by week 1? Read on to find out…
Howard: When I turn on ABDC, sometimes I get a good feeling.
LeKeith: Because you’re filled with the hope that Layla Kayleigh is going to be on your screen?
Howard: Yup, pretty much. What did you think of Flo Rida’s triumphant return to the ABDC stage?
LeKeith: I’m trying to think of a Flo Rida Pun they didn’t use in the episode. They kinda ran the gamut.
Howard: Yeah, we really can’t beat the Top Pun Scientists hired by ABDC.
LeKeith: I intend to try!
Howard: I approve of your endeavor. What did you think of the opening routine?
LeKeith: I was confused by it There was a lot going on
Howard: Yeah, I think a lot of the blame goes to the directors though. There were moments when the crews were clearly doing some kind of big move, but they kept the camera tight on Flo Rida.
LeKeith: Oh, yeah. there’s that too. I meant stuff like the glasses. Were they 3D glasses? Is that why Flo Rida kept saying “A3DC”? Or were they a Teaser for the Will Smith Season of the Superstar Episode, giving everybody the updated MiB glasses? That kind of stuff.
Howard: That would be the greatest tease of all time.
LeKeith: If we keep saying it, it will happen.
Howard: I concur.
LeKeith: That’s what I learned from the back of the Secret: The Book: The DVD back cover.
LeKeith: Also, am I’m speaking for myself, black people don’t really crowd surf. We keep too many things in our pockets. Wallets, Keys, Gum, Breath Mints, Bounty, Combs.
Howard: ABDC is all about breaking down those barriers. They don’t see colors on that show.
LeKeith: Fair enough.
Howard: This may be why Asians keep winning. Our eyes are the only discernable racial identifier.
LeKeith: HAHA! They do see age though.
Howard: Yes. Let’s discuss how Howard threw another book at his TV.
LeKeith: But before we get to them, we need to discuss Purple Stuff. Or the Electrolytes, if you prefer.
Howard: HA! They had the misfortune of going first, I think.
LeKeith: And being a man down.
Howard: Yeah. But I think the later crews are able to capitalize on the crowd’s energy, to some extent. Whereas their routine definitely started off soft and built in intensity as they got into it and the crowd got into it.
LeKeith: All that being said, I thought they were pretty solid. And I did find it appropriate that they did a lot of karate gestures though.
Howard: It’s true. Though it was a later crew that got the best karate move of the night.
LeKeith: Oh, totally.
Howard: Overall though, I agree with you. They were pretty solid.
LeKeith: But you’re right. They were consistent with the other crews this night. They kinda had two halves to their routine with the second half being stronger.
Howard: I liked the slow mo that D-Trix highlighted, where one dude did the headslide across the group.
LeKeith: Yeah, that was my favorite part too. Everything came together from set up to execution. Lil Mama’s highlight was my least favorite though.
Howard: The “beat your chest” formation?
LeKeith: Because it wasn’t geometric shape or beating their chests: they were doing the Double Shake Weight.
Howard: It wasn’t my favorite, but it was clearly the point where their routine went into overdrive. And, as you know, I love the Double Shake Weight.
LeKeith: I know you do. I don’t like the moves where everyone just starts waving their arms all akimbo.
Howard: HA! Well, let’s jump to the next crew, that had me waving my arm akimbo at the start.
LeKeith: Before we do, can we distinguish between Flo Rida, the performer and Flo Rida the Judge. Because I’d like to call him Pun Writa when he’s a judge.
Howard: Listen, who are you to judge the Poet Laureate of our generation?
LeKeith: I’m not judging him. He wrote some great puns.
Howard: Who are you to doubt El Dandy?
Howard: But yes, Flo Rida was a better than average guest judge.
LeKeith: The problem is he either didn’t clear them with MTV because Mario Lopez had the same puns! You can’t use the same bit twice in a row, MTV
Howard: Agreed. Mario needs to use that Extra experience to improv some new shit on the fly!
LeKeith: I completely agree. Or they settle it like gentlemen: arm wrestle before.
Howard: So what did you think of NXT?
LeKeith: No lie: my brother called them the same thing. I called them Codename: Kids Next Door.
Howard: HA! They’re a little too old for that, I think. Plus, they’re just like NXT. You thought it was going to be awful, but then you discovered the secret Derrick Bateman. And they were actually pretty good.
LeKeith: I think the secret Derrick Bateman comes later. I have one gripe though.
Howard: I think it helps that they’re a little older than both the Lil’ Broskis and Baskin Robbins. What was your complaint?
LeKeith: I know when you’re 13-15, your world view is super small. But before you say, “We have to sacrifice a lot,” you need to calm down. What did you give up? Double Dutch? And granted, I don’t know them so there may be more but let’s keep things in perspective.
Howard: It’s true, they haven’t faced any real challenges in life other than figuring out their Facebook profile photo.
LeKeith: I always think of like Alex Wong. He broke his knee. Twice! Still Dancing.
LeKeith: But yeah, as performers, they were great. And I agree that them being older was definitely a factor.
Howard: Of course, we say this now, but next week’s video package will reveal that all of their parents disappeared on the same cruise or something. And then we’ll be the assholes.
LeKeith: Yeah, I know. I’ll take full blame for that.
Howard: Fair enough.
LeKeith: I’m just trying to help you persevere, Young Kaba.
Howard: I’m curious to see what they’ll learn and pick up from the other crews. Because they haven’t shown any aptitude for stunts yet. So learning things from groups like Fanny Pak will help them develop the most, I think.
LeKeith: I’m curious what’ll happen when they need to come up with newer things in a shorter time period.
Howard: It’s true. They’re just a smidge too old to rely fully on cuteness factor.
Howard: Overall, I feel like they’re in a good place though. If they surprise us, that’s impressive. But if not, they’ve always got the “we’re kids” excuse.
LeKeith: I think they have a good shot of winning it.
Howard: Their first performance fills me with some hope that they will actually bring some talent to the stage.
LeKeith: I do, however, disagree with giving them such a naughty song though. A song I didn’t figure out the context of until I saw the closed captioning during the video.
Howard: HAHA! Yes, ABDC, let’s make a concerted effort to not give the little kids overtly sexual songs.
LeKeith: Flo Rida used Dead or Alive to trick me! Also, JC and Flo, cool it with the “checking IDs” and “4 Years Older” comments.
Howard: I did appreciate D-Trix, who is likely the youngest member of the judges panel, raising the “You Damn Kids” complaint.
LeKeith: As did I!
Howard: Someone needs to pull off his mask to reveal Old Man Stevenson. Who owns the run down amusement park.
LeKeith: My money’s on Lil Mama. That’s why she’s been understated these past two episodes.
Howard: HA! What did you think of Final Destination? That’s right. I went there.
LeKeith: Snap! You know what my favorite thing about Southern crews?
Howard: They know dances like the Forrest Gump?
Howard: I refuse to believe that’s a real thing.
LeKeith: As do I. And yet, I can’t help but imaging what that move is. It’s like filling in the bleeps on an episode of Jerry Springer. “How imaginative can I be today?”
Howard: Right?! Do you just run in place forever? Eat a bunch of shrimp? Find random historical figures to interact with at the club?
LeKeith: Play Ping Pong against a Wall?
Howard: That’s got to be it. I have to say, they started things off hot.
LeKeith: Well, for a song called “Low” they were not, which I approved of. That leap that the beginning? Awesome. Also, one more pun: Low-tharios. There. It’s out there.
Howard: HA! I like how they framed the leap by having one guy do upside down splits.
LeKeith: I loved how they played the crowd and performed to all sides.
Howard: Plus, I appreciated the Big Booty Slap gag. Overall, they were my second favorite performance of the night.
LeKeith: As did I. They would have been my favorite if they had turned their board breaking move into a Boom Drop.
LeKeith: But they set up for one “Low” moment. and I like routines like that.
Howard: Yup. I feel like Lil’ Mama needs to say crazier shit. Because I seriously have next to nothing to say about the judges.
LeKeith: Flo Rida didn’t a make a Pun. That’s all I’ve got.
Howard: That’s because he was too busy challenging Vince to a fight for the hand of Lil’ Mama.
LeKeith: Oh yeah! I wouldn’t challenge him, Vince. Go ask Heath Slater what happens.
Howard: Anyway, I hope Final Destination makes it far. But if they see Tony Todd, they should just start running in the opposite direction.
LeKeith: The Candyman?
Howard: He’s also the harbinger of Death in the Final Destination movies.
LeKeith: So you’re done for either way…
Howard: Pretty much. What did you think of the Mexicools?
LeKeith: Well, they did one of the things I love. They mimed as instruments. So I was already in their pocket.
LeKeith: Plus, they made me thirsty.
Howard: I feel like the piano bit at the beginning was the best part. And it all slowed down after that for me.
LeKeith: Yeah, they definitely slowed down into a just okay routine. And I was saddened when they weren’t in sync putting the piano away.
Howard: Except! That part where the lyrics had the words “lion’s den” and the dude with the big afro made a Lion Face. That cracked me up.
LeKeith: Guillermo Martinez Charur!
Howard: That is the best name on the show.
LeKeith: Right?!? I’m going to jump ahead for a second because his facial expression during D-Trix’s comments was the best
Howard: HA! We totes need to screencap him.
Howard: I will say that the sections with Latin Flavor gave me horrible Afroborike flashbacks. Which isn’t to say that they’re on that level of sadness. But it couldn’t be helped.
LeKeith: It’s funny. Their Random Latin Dancing In the middle was better than Afroborike’s dancing all season.
Howard: I’ll sign my name to that.
LeKeith: HA! Also, bro hit the Mexico Lean at the end. I want to make fun but that was straight Swagger.
Howard: It’s true. I hope they don’t become too dependent on Gymnastics Chick to do some flips every week.
LeKeith: Oh, you know that’s happening.
Howard: Because if that’s going to be a theme, she better break out a shooting star press or something insane.
LeKeith: That would be amazing! You know what worried me a little though?
Howard: What’s that?
LeKeith: How the Mexican Crew was the only crew to either A) be put to work immediately (on Flo Rida’s new video) or B) leave the stage with a job. I can’t tell if the lackadaisical American Work Ethic has extended to the Dance World either.
Howard: “They’re stealing our jobs!” Don’t be going all Tea Party on me.
LeKeith: No, I think it’s more power to them. But it’s also messed up that it happened. All the other crews were told, “Go in the back, you did a good job, relax.” Out come the Mexicools and Flo Rida’s like, “I’m gonna put you to work.”
LeKeith: If Oh Canada’s Dad saw that, he’d be pissed.
Howard: So this brings us to Mos Def.
LeKeith: Okay. What your thoughts? Because I started with an immediate gripe against them.
Howard: I was a huge fan. But before I gush, what was your gripe?
LeKeith: Okay. Their dancing: huge fan. Real competition for Fanny Pak. But here’s thing. If you’re a group of teachers, teach throughout.
LeKeith: MOS Crew could easily be MOST Crew and teach spelling and grammar right along with Dance. MOS stands for Movement Over Sound. MOST = Movement Over Sound Technique. Bam! Done. Two birds, guys. Two birds.
Howard: HA! OK, I see that your love of grammar trumps your love of dance. But I’m glad we’re in sync in terms of the dancing.
LeKeith: Yes, they are really terrific dancers. And JC aptly said they had the best routine of the night. I agree.
Howard: It was the only routine that I watched twice, to be honest.
LeKeith: As did I. There was this one switch they did with their feet that was so simple but so amazing. I watched that twice and Guillermo Martinez Charur’s reaction twice.
Howard: HA! I didn’t even mind that they used the single file to peel off. Which was my big ABDC-wide gripe last week.
LeKeith: Well, when it’s done well, it’s hard to complain. I really enjoyed that routine from top to bottom.
Howard: It was similar to last week – where Fanny Pak was just on a different level from everyone else.
LeKeith: Absolutely. They were the best team this week and will give Fanny Pak a run for their money.
Howard: The first “hands in the air” section where it was bouncing off their bodies just sealed the deal for me. The technique and creativity they displayed there just put the heads and shoulders above everyone else.
LeKeith: Oh, that was spectacular.
Howard: I can ultimately see why they split the groups of five the way that they did. And I can’t help but wonder if Mos Def is saving some tricks for later in the season.
LeKeith: Yeah. Was there an East Coast crew? Was the furthest East Atlanta?
Howard: I think so.
LeKeith: Man… What did you think of the Battle Round?
Howard: I have to admit that I was severely disappointed that Flo Rida didn’t perform live. Like he did in the inaugural Battle Round.
LeKeith: But he performed at the beginning! Don’t get greedy.
Howard: That moment is the closest that ABDC has come to the sad campiness of Dance 360.
LeKeith: There’s only so much Flo to go around.
Howard: It’s true. But overall, I can’t disagree with the judges’ decision.
LeKeith: I disagreed with them a little.
Howard: I would have loved to see the LA boys stick around, but Mixed Nuts did not bring that fire. I think I’m judging on a bit of a sliding scale though.
LeKeith: I thought Mixed Nuts battled better but I’d rather see more of the MexiCools.
Howard: See, I was the exact opposite. But I felt like Mixed Nuts gave us 75%. Whereas the Mexicools were rocking at a higher level.
LeKeith: I think the Mixed Nuts put too much stock on their b-boy. And like last week, he did not perform up to the ABDC standard.
Howard: Objectively, I felt like I’d give both performances the same grade, so I have to reward the team that worked harder. Neither one really wowed me.
LeKeith: Well I give it to the Mexicools because they did an unassisted headstand and headbop.
Howard: HA! That was probably the most memorable move of the battle.
LeKeith: But by the second round they were very disjointed and just started doing whacking/swiping moves at the Mixed Nuts. Whereas the Mixed Nuts were mimicking their moves while waiting.
Howard: It’s true.
LeKeith: It was like Master the Move on Dance 360.
Howard: Maybe I’m just underrating them, but I feel like that was indicative of their overall potential though. It felt like they left most of it on the floor. Maybe not everything, but most of it.
LeKeith: That they were the Dance 360 Crew of ABDC?
LeKeith: I’ll accept that title on their behalf.
Howard: Man, I miss Dance 360. I wonder what Fredro Starr is doing now.
Howard: I will never stop laughing at his dismissals of people. “Back to the party, man!” SHOVE.
LeKeith: That was amazing. ABDC should do a tribute show. With a Hologram DJ K-Sly.
Howard: I think I would literally cry tears of joy. And on that note, we out!